Difficult Conversations Podcast
Lessons I Learned as an ICU Physician
Episode 181 | March 20, 2023
Making an Impact
Ryan Estis
Founder/Keynote Speaker/ Impact Eleven
Welcome to Difficult Conversations with Dr. Anthony Orsini. Today our guest is Mr. Ryan Estis, who is a globally recognized sales and leadership expert, speaker and author. Ryan has been advising clients on navigating change, improving performance, influencing culture, and accelerating growth. He’s a Founding Partner of ImpactEleven, where he’s helping define and shape a community that’s influencing culture and shaping the future of both personal and professional growth. In this episode, we talk about Ryan’s story and how he went from a rockstar rising sales professional to becoming one of the top keynote speakers in the industry. As a speaker, Ryan is known for his innovative ideas on leading change, improving sales effectiveness, and preparing for the future of work. He’s been recognized as one of “the best keynote speakers ever heard” by Meetings & Conventions magazine. His works and writings have been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, and Entrepreneur Magazines,. His book Prepare for Impact, coming later this year, offers a playbook for individuals to capture opportunity, accelerate growth, and leading into the future. As always, the promise on this show will be to inspire you and teach you how important communication is in medicine, business, and in everyday life.
Ryan shares his story about hearing a speaker that changed the perspective of his career and inspired him to follow his passion to teach and coach. We hear the path Ryan took to master the craft of speaking. Preparing for a keynote takes a lot of work, and we’ll find out about the hundreds of hours of preparation, perfecting the delivery, and bringing the energy into a conference. We hear how Dr. Orsini met Ryan and how he helped him bring his speaking skills to another level. Ryan tells us about how the word “community” kept coming up in his life, and this is what led to the creation of ImpactEleven, a place where people can be inspired to share, teach, and spread their message to the world. Dr. Orsini explains how attending the ImpactEleven Bootcamp had such an influence on him. We’ll find out about how bootcamp started and the meaning behind Ryan’s mantra, We’re better together! Liz shares the experience she had learning about ImpactEleven’s operating principle called, “Give generously, don’t keep score.” Ryan tells us about the importance of storytelling? He shares with us how a story about a cup of coffee changed his life.
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Ryan Estis (2s):
People remember the story, I think 24 hours after a presentation that 65% of people can recall stories about 5% can recall statistics, Stories are what connects us. It’s what opens our hearts. It’s what moves us as humans. And we’re wired for story. It’s how we learn, it’s how we relate, it’s how we connect. When you say something like, yeah, I’m a crier, and it was at my daughter’s wedding and I had to give this toast even a story like that, you know, I can remember, oh, and when I gave the best man’s speech at my best friend’s wedding from college. I was getting all choked up like, just find us. We can see ourselves in others. and it’s a human connection.
Ryan Estis (42s):
And so, you know, to be a great keynote speaker is really mastering the art of story. And so a big part of what we do at Impact Eleven is we help people cultivate and develop their storybook.
Announcer (55s):
Welcome to Difficult Conversations: Lessons I learned as an ICU Physician with Dr Anthony Orsini. Dr. Orsini is a practicing physician and president and CEO of The Orsini Way. As a frequent keynote speaker and author, Dr Orsini has been training healthcare professionals and business leaders how to navigate through the most difficult dialogues. Each week. you will hear inspiring interviews with experts in their field who tell their story and provide practical advice on how to effectively communicate. Whether, you are a doctor faced with giving a patient bad news, a business leader who wants to get the most out of his or her team members, or someone who just wants to learn to communicate better this is the podcast for you.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (1m 40s):
Well, welcome to another episode of Difficult Conversations: Lessons I Learned as an ICU physician. This is Dr Anthony Orsini, and I’m going to be your co-host today alongside Liz Poret-Christ, who as you know is our director of programming at the Orsini Way. Today our guest is someone whom I’ve personally spent a lot of time with over the last 12 to 15 months. He’s become a friend, a coach, and really an inspiration to me. My guest today is Mr. Ryan Estis. Ryan is a globally recognized sales and leadership expert and author. He previously spent 15 years as a Fortune 500 chief revenue officer leading the go-to market strategy and building a client roster of category leading brands.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (2m 21s):
Over the course of the last decade, Ryan has been advising clients on navigating change, improving performance, influencing culture, and accelerating growth. He is a Founding partner of ImpactEleven where he is helping define and shape a community that is influencing culture and shaping the future of both personal and professional growth. In today’s episode, we’re gonna talk about Ryan s story and how he went from a rockstar rising sales professional to becoming one of the top keynote speakers in the industry. As a keynote speaker, Ryan is known for his innovative ideas on leading change, improving sales effectiveness, and preparing for the future of work.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (3m 0s):
He has been recognized as one of the best keynote speakers ever heard by meetings in Convention Magazine. Alongside such names as Tony Robbins, Bill Gates, Colin Powell, and Mike Ditka. His works and writings have been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, Entrepreneur magazine. His book, “Prepare for Impact: Driving Growth and Serving Others to the Principles of Human-Centered Leadership” offers a playbook for individuals to capture opportunity, accelerate growth, and lead into the future. Well, welcome Ryan. It’s been really great to finally get you on this podcast. You are incredibly busy. You and I have gotten to know each other really well, and I’m so excited to have you here today.
Ryan Estis (3m 41s):
Thank you. Well, it’s great to be here. I love the work that you’re doing, and so I was looking forward to this too.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (3m 47s):
I was looking at it, it seems like I know you a lot longer, but it’s only been about 15 months and I’ve got to know you. You know, I’m such a huge fan even though you’re younger than I am, but I really do think of you as a mentor, certainly a great coach. But you know, I always talk about with my audience when I speak about the importance of building rapport. And so rather than give a long introduction about Ryan, which I did already, but I really just want to hear, you know, as we say to all our guests, just tell the audience about yourself, who you are, and how you’ve reached the pinnacle of your career, which is being on this podcast.
Ryan Estis (4m 19s):
Well, this is the pinnacle, this is it. The mountain top. Little background on me. So I grew up in Ohio. I’m the son of two school teachers, and when I graduated from college, you know, the career path was clear it was gonna be professional sales. I still consider that a big aspect of what I do today, but I sort of ascended in that career. I had a couple defining moments and one was a night that I spent with a professional speaker by the name of Jim Rowan. He changed the trajectory of my career, my life, my perspectives. I actually still have the notes from that session. I was 23, 24 years old and I, just remember that night I was so mesmerized by him and I consumed all of his content, his books on tape, and it really, that put me on a path to continue to invest in myself.
Ryan Estis (5m 2s):
And it kind of became a lifelong student and learner and I thought the back of my head. Wow, If there was ever a day where I get to stand in a place like that and share what’s on my mind and my heart, my experiences, you know, that would be the ultimate sort of to your point, pinnacle of my career. And you know, as I moved through the ranks of corporate America, I worked for an advertising agency. I ended up running the national sales organization. I started doing a lot of speaking in that role, speaking, writing, thought leadership, really to develop our own business. I wasn’t doing it for any other reason, but those were the days that I looked forward to the most. And those were the days I was the most switched on. And you know, eventually I sort of came to a fork in the road where just decided that was my moment.
Ryan Estis (5m 44s):
I wanted to go do that for a living. I wanted to teach, I wanted to train and I wanted to coach. I wanted to work in my own business. And so after some research and study hiring my own coach, I made the transition And. that was 13 years ago and I’ve never looked back. I love the work and it continues to change and expand and I’ve never had more fun with it than I am right now.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (6m 6s):
Well, you certainly followed your passion, but it’s a tough thing to do, especially when you are successful. There’s a lot of people out there who have a passion and maybe they’re not working in it and it’s tough to say, I’m gonna give up all this money and better myself. Take me through that conversation with yourself. As we would say,
Ryan Estis (6m 25s):
It’s one of the questions I get asked the most is, well, how did you make that choice? How did you make that leap? How did you know it would work out? And so the first myth to dispell as I didn’t, I didn’t know it would work, there’s no guarantee, you know, but I think in some respects the idea that, you know, we’re betting on someone else also was a false sense of security. and I think we’ve seen that a lot of evidence of that over the last handful of years is, and so ultimately I, I got to a point where I didn’t think betting on myself was a huge risk. It was something to walk away from. I’ve been with the company for over 15 years, great relationships. I had a lot of equity built up in the industry. But I got to a point where I realized, you know, I really assessed, hey, how do I wanna spend the next 20 or 30 years and it wasn’t doing what I had been doing.
Ryan Estis (7m 9s):
And I always think success is an interesting thing. You gotta be careful about sitting your ladder against the wrong wall and getting to the top of it and looking around saying that’s it. I felt some of that, you could call it an internal crisis or maybe a crisis of meaning, but it was also an invitation to start to do some self-reflection and exploration. What do I want? How do I want to? And as I started to answer those questions, I realized clearly I’m gonna go down a different path. But the key to doing so is doing so iteratively. You know, you don’t have to put all your eggs in the basket in one day. So if you think thought leadership speaking right at consulting, I was sort of dual tracking that, you know, I was building my skill and competency while I had my job.
Ryan Estis (7m 50s):
So the dual tracking approach, I think it minimizes the risk. You can test an idea, you can prove something and the marketplace validates something. and I think a lot of the people that we work with at ImpactEleven, the people I coach and support are doing that dual tracking to one day you reach the inflection point and you make the decision. And, that was certainly the case for me.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (8m 10s):
No, it’s been said, I became successful gradually and then suddenly it’s a great quote. But I’ve learned from you that keynote speaking and speaking is a skill. And the biggest misconception about speaking I think is that you are either good at it or you’re not. Everybody, oh, he’s a great speaker. The guy that gets up at the wedding and gives his great speech. But it’s not like that. And, and I had you as a coach in ImpactEleven, which we’re gonna talk about, and you said you read a lot of books. And so how did you come to this? You know, I’m sure you were not born as good as you are now. What was your path on how to hone in your skills?
Ryan Estis (8m 47s):
I would say the path considered several parts. I mean, I think the first chapter, the journey, you know, was honing the skill or the craft of, of giving presentations as a professional salesperson. Say thank you, over 30 years I’ve given thousands of thousands of presentations. So practice and repetition certainly helps And that. Obviously, you know, building a team, becoming a leader inside of a Fortune 500 company, putting the right people around me, it was just a craft or a skill that I honned. So that’s the first thing to practice. The second thing is I stayed a student. I was a junkie addicted to Ted Talks and self help books and books on tape and seminars and retreats and Tony Robbins and all of it, like the amount of consumption.
Ryan Estis (9m 32s):
So I’ve given tens of thousands of presentations, I’ve consumed tens of thousands of presentations, it became an obsession of mine. I’m not interested in having a four handicap on the golf course. I’m interested in watching the art of effective public speaking and taking notes. That’s my obsession. But I still wasn’t a professional, you know, through my corporate practice. But then I started doing it at conferences, then I started doing it sort of in the domain that I’m in now while I had my job And that I realized it was a new craft. And then I hired a coach. You know, I hired my first coach, Jane Atkinson, I hired another coach, Dr. Nick Morgan, while I had my job, by the way, I went to work on this craft.
Ryan Estis (10m 17s):
And after two years of research, self-study, practice and exploration, then I made the decision to go all in full-time. And by the way, the learning never stops. I go to ImpactEleven and I get better at every Bootcamp. I still am participating in our mastermind. I work with the partners in the community to unpack my stuff. I’m redoing my website and relaunching my brand. So I think for anybody that’s interested in sort of mastering the craft, the learning and the work on it never stops.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (10m 50s):
And I think you told me a long time ago, you have to do it as much as you can to get better at it. There are people who are have a higher baseline than others, And, that comes through time. But you know, I’ve shown your Starbucks, that was the best cup of coffee I’ve ever had, which we’ll talk about later, which is really just an amazing to many people. and it, wow, what a great speaker Ryan is, is hand gestures is face. And what they don’t understand is some of that’s natural, but it’s also learned, right? I mean that’s what I’ve learned from you is that this is a skill just as a baseball player practices his swing and his ground balls and throwing to first base, it’s a skill like everything else. and I think the biggest misconception about speaking because people go to conferences all the time, say, wow, he was a great speaker.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (11m 32s):
You know, they think, at least my friends think, That, you just get up in the morning, put on your shirt and tie whatever, go to a conference and speak off the top of your head. But there’s a lot of preparation going into that presentation, isn’t there?
Ryan Estis (11m 47s):
Yeah, I mean it’s actually quite the opposite. It’s hundreds of hours of preparation analysis, it’s construction, editing, adjusting, look, it’s kinda like a U2 concert, right? Bono’s a pretty good singer, but the four of them said they’re not gonna walk up on stage in an arena and just figure out in the moment what they’re gonna play. It’s rehearsed and it’s exacting and it’s vetted and they build up the arc of the set and then they bring the audience back and they build it up again. And there’s a lot of thought in putting together both the content but also the delivery package and it’s performance art. And yes, there’s a lot of you energy in the performance, but the idea is to create a structure both in terms of content and a delivery experience that’s gonna really resonate with the audience, where you’re actually then able to be the best version of who you are and bring all of your full self and the weight of your experience and your insight and your perspective to bear on that hour or that moment.
Ryan Estis (12m 49s):
and I think coaching that and teaching that, that process, that system is what we’re focused on doing at Impact Eleven.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (12m 57s):
And let’s talk about that a little bit. It takes you a while, you gradually then suddenly become successful and you’re doing really well. So for the audience, I came to know you, I, it’s probably about 15, 16 months ago, maybe a little bit longer, I was speaking to someone at a speakers bureau and they said to me, you know, you need to meet these guys that then it was called Three Ring Circus and you got on the phone call with a couple other people. There were two things that impressed me. First, it wasn’t a sales call, you weren’t trying to sell me a whole bunch of things that most people do. It was a very frank and good conversation. But what really impressed me is that, you didn’t need this, right? You were very successful. It’s not like this is a way of making money that this was a bunch of guys who were already successful that just wanted to teach other people how to do it, that there was enough to go around with.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (13m 46s):
So take me through that process of how you formed Three Ring Circus, And, then ImpactEleven.
Ryan Estis (13m 51s):
Yeah, so the original inception of Three Ringing Circus, I wasn’t involved in you And, that was really Josh Linkner and Jordan Rowan who worked for Josh at the time. That was their inception and I think part of what was happening was Josh was very talented and getting asked alot, Hey, can I pick your brain? Can I buy you a cup of coffee? I wanna learn how to do this too. And Josh said, okay, I can’t honor a hundred coffee requests, but one weekend a year we’re gonna open the kimono so to speak, and anybody that wants to come in Detroit, we’ll show ’em what we do. And sort of just Josh, his generosity, his an abundance mindset, he’s really got a servants heart. And then, you know, as I got to know Josh, or we got connected sort of during the Covid pause and it was a pause for a professional speaker.
Ryan Estis (14m 34s):
You know, there weren’t any events, there weren’t any conferences. I got to sort of sit still for a minute, reflect on the last 10 years and then think about, okay, how do I wanna do this the next 10 years? and I love this business, it’s a wonderful business. I wouldn’t trade the journey, but there were some challenges. Number one, it’s a very isolating business business. You know, I left the big job, I was around a big team and then to your point, you become successful, which means that, you’re booked 80, 90 times a year. I was living in a hotel rooms by myself over a hundred nights a year. I just didn’t anticipate how that would feel. And in many ways it’s a very isolating and lonely business. And the second thing was, yes, I had some innate talent and yes, I worked really hard at it, but I was also hitting a plateau.
Ryan Estis (15m 17s):
And I thought, okay, now how am I gonna get better? Where am I gonna go to learn? And frankly, I don’t wanna do this alone anymore. And as I got together with Josh and Seth and Pete, we started to kick around some ideas during the Covid pause that turned into a weekend, it turned into a dinner or turned into another conversation and it was like, okay, we could do this together. And if we all feel this way, imagine there’s other people like that who feel this way and So that the word community kept coming up for me, kept coming up my personal life. I need a community and it kept coming up my professional life. I need a team, I need a community. and I always say like ImpactEleven, we created what we want, what we need it. and it turns out a lot of other people like you and this amazing group of inspiring people needed it too.
Ryan Estis (16m 3s):
And now we have the sense of place and it serves our professional development. But I think it serves more than that. I think it serves to raise the standard of the industry. I think it creates opportunity and I think it’s giving more people who have a message on their heart, an opportunity and a platform to share that message with the world. And ultimately that’s the movement that changes the world. It’s ideas and people that are inspired to go out and share those ideas. And so to have a community of place where we can go and inspire that and teach it has been intrinsically rewarding beyond measure, but it’s also made me better at my craft and my practice. So there’s a double edge benefit and you know, it’s just the work I’m called to do.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (16m 43s):
I remember our first conversation, you and I were speaking and I think Matt was on the phone call. A couple other people were on the phone call. I don’t know if it was you or someone else asked me, you know, why do you wanna be a keynote speaker? And my answer was, I feel like I have this message. I feel like I have the answer to so many problems and I’m at the top of the mountain and it and I wanted you to help me get an audience So that I can listen. and I saw a big smile on your face when I said that. And I’m like, okay, he gets me. So, that was a turning point. And so the first introduction was the Bootcamp and I ImpactEleven has the Bootcamp, that was last March, I believe it was in Florida.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (17m 23s):
And for the people out there, the Bootcamp is, I’ll let Ryan describe it more. It’s a two day really convention or lecture series on the business of keynote speaking. and it is described correctly as drinking through a fire hose. It is just two days of just massive amounts of information. And in fact, I hope to go back again because there’s no way you could absorb all that, but that’s like the introduction to Keynote speaking and to impact. So tell us about that and how that started.
Ryan Estis (17m 54s):
Yeah, the Bootcamp, it’s our signature live event and it’s really sort of the intro point into the ImpactEleven community and it’s exactly what you described. It’s a two and a half day sprint through the business of keynote speaking. and I would say it’s fairly evenly divided between running the business, being a practitioner. How do you build a business around your thought leadership? And then we spend a lot of time, as you know, on stage craft, how do you walk on that stage and deliver a message that’s on your heart in a way that is compelling and relevant and inspiring. The other thing that’s happening is, you know, the industry’s coming in to support that. So as, as you know, you know, we always have a panel that includes agents, bureau partners that come in and talk about how to get booked and how to be bureau ready and how to build those relationships and partnerships.
Ryan Estis (18m 39s):
And I really think of it as a speaker accelerator. Like if you wanna do this business and you wanna monetize your expertise and you want to be on stages, there’s no better place in the world to come. There’s no better community to be around. And so Bootcamp previously is what the company was, it was four bootcamps a year and then people would build relationships and eventually like you, they’d work on their craft for a year and get better and start to build a few bureau partners and that may come back and Bootcamp would be a different experience and the content’s always iterating. But we’ve extended ImpactEleven beyond bootcamp, it’s a community now and it’s a subscription service and there’s a whole digital platform and there’s masterminds and coaching and creative services and you attended Demo Day to get your reel ready.
Ryan Estis (19m 24s):
And now we’ve got Full Day Masterclass as an extension to Bootcamp. And so we’re building out a much broader content portfolio and IP library. So this becomes the place that professionals go to develop their skill, to build their career and to build the relationships they need to grow the business. And that’s where we’re at today and it’s a lot of fun, but bootcamp’s a great place to dive in.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (19m 50s):
They had a real impact on me. I got to meet you in person and there was a whole bunch of great, I met Seth and I met the people that were attending. I’m gonna think maybe there were about 40 people there, something like that that day. and I’ve become friends with other people, we’ve networked, I met some people in the speakers bureau, it was really good. But again, what impressed me about it and since then I’ve gone on, I’ve gone, what really impressed me about it, there was no upsell. This wasn’t a group of guys. As I said, you don’t need this, right? This is not a group of guys said, I’m gonna give you Bootcamp, but now let me sell you this timeshare. There’s none of that. and I was so impressed. Ryan’s been my coach, I’ve hired Ryan as a coach, we’ve done some great sessions, he’s helped me really master my keynote and worked with me with presentations and I did the demo reel and I hope to become part of the community soon.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (20m 41s):
And it’s just a great experience for those people who really dedicated to this. But what you do learn, I think you touched upon this, it’s hard work. Again, I think my friends that I have think, oh you know what, that was a great speech. You know, I just gave a speech at my daughter’s wedding in December, which was the toughest speech I’ve ever given. You know, just trying to hold it together and And
Liz Poret-Christ (21m 2s):
He’s a crier.
Ryan Estis (21m 3s):
Yeah
Dr. Anthony Orsini (21m 4s):
That’s Liz on the line and I forgot to tell everybody. Liz is also here and with me, Liz is our director of programming. And yeah, being a crier and trying to get through that was not easy. But people say to me, and I started to say to you all the time, wow, you’re a really great public speaker, but it’s not by accident. You gotta work really, really hard on that. So I think that’s what really made an impression on me is this is something that’s not easy. That, you alluded to it, you’re on the road about 80-100 days a year.
Ryan Estis (21m 33s):
Yeah, I mean look, I just got home, I mean last week I was in, I started in Destin, Florida, spoke Tuesday morning, spoke Wednesday morning in Sacramento, California. And, that’s not an easy place to get to on one night at traveling. So I’d flew all night, spoke in Sacramento, then spoke the next day in Kansas City. So you know, I’m getting in at two, three in the morning, different time zones, getting different hotel, getting up, speaking again, then getting to the airport, getting on a plane. I spoke in Dallas and Saturday I got home last night, I’m headed to Atlanta again tomorrow. I mean that’s not, we’re in it. Plus we’re planning Bootcamp for Austin. It’s not easy. But for people like you, like you know, your feedback, your reflection back to me, it really hit me in the heart. It’s meaningful because when I met you, I mean those are very kind things you said, but it was like man, this guy’s got a ton of experience and he’s got a special message the world needs to hear right now.
Ryan Estis (22m 24s):
Yeah, it’s on his heart but it’s also in his head. And he wrote the book and he’s got a framework and like this is important. And so how can we create a scenario where if this is really what he wants, you have to do the work. I can’t do it for you, but if this is really what you want, how can we put you in a position where those ideas, that message is unleashed on the world and we get a thousand people in a community like you who have that in their head and their heart, And that experience, And that gift and they’re called to share it and do the work. That’s what makes the world a better place. It’s the ideas. And so every company you walk into, every healthcare system, That, you touch every doctor that hears your message and pauses and says, wow, okay, I need to think about that differently.
Ryan Estis (23m 7s):
Like that’s what inspires me. And so I always say my little mantras, were better together. I’m better cuz I met you. I’m better because I get to go to Bootcamp, I’m better cuz I work with Josh and I hope everybody’s better too. If we’re all growing together, the industry gets better. And that’s the whole idea.
Liz Poret-Christ (23m 25s):
One thing that really stood out with me, I had the opportunity to watch one of the recorded community calls and there were some big name speakers on that call and everyone’s generosity to share their best practices, to talk about the things that are hard, how they overcame them, what to do next. There was absolutely zero competition, worried about protecting assets, there was none of that. It was just this incredibly open, this is how I do it, this is what worked for me, what do you think would work better? And everyone was so gracious and generous and listening to people like Cassandra Worthy just explode from the screen with her personality and her dynamic nature.
Liz Poret-Christ (24m 13s):
It was so inspiring to watch that because I’ve been with Tony from day one, maybe not day one, day two. And as the managing director of the company, it’s always my job to say, okay, Tony wants to do this. Is this something that we can do? and I always believed in our messaging and knew that Tony was a phenomenal speaker, but watching him speak at a series of lectures that we gave in October after he spent a lot of time with you Ryan, I saw so much of your influence on his process and his performance and it really transcended anything that I thought that we were to what we could be now. And it’s, I think it’s just an amazing opportunity to be part of this.
Ryan Estis (24m 56s):
Well that’s a beautiful share. Thank you. You know, we have specific to the community call And, that experience you had, we have a, an operating principle and it’s one of my favorite, it’s called give generously don’t keep score. And it’s very much on the foundation of an abundance mindset. I like to think of us as we’re competitive collaborators. Yeah, I mean there’s a little cross competition of course, but the spirit of this is, there’s enough for all of us. And that when we all get better impact the industry wins and the audiences we serve really win. And look Tony, from the minute we met, I was like, he wants to do this. His message is for right now and I’m gonna do everything I can to make sure he has a chance to do what’s on his heart and if he does the work it’s gonna happen.
Ryan Estis (25m 43s):
And. That’s sort of my thinking. And you see that around ImpactEleven. We have people that are in the N F L Hall of Fame and massive tech entrepreneurs and philanthropists and special operators from the military and incredible physicians and business people and who wouldn’t wanna go for two or three days. and we meet these people and be part of this community and it such a privilege to be on this journey with and meet people like Tony and work together and we all grow. So I’m inspired and I think Tony is gonna go on and have a wonderful career and he is gonna help a lot of people. And So that inspires me.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (26m 20s):
Ryan, that’s exactly what happened in October. Liz saw me speak, she’s like, give her two or three times during that lecture. and I was like, oh my god, that’s Ryan. I was like, I say, well thank you. That’s a great thing. He’s like, you just look just like Ryan when you said that, when you emphasize those words, I’m like, all right, good. Well I learned something so that’s excellent.
Liz Poret-Christ (26m 38s):
Ryan, I hadn’t even met you yet and I saw it coming
Ryan Estis (26m 41s):
Well hey, that’s the highest, highest phrase I could get. So I’m glad to hear it. And you know, I always say we’re just getting started.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (26m 48s):
Yeah, we are. And I’m really excited about that. you had mentioned the how many days a year you travel and I, remember one thing I learned at Bootcamp was that most keynote speakers are, are actually introverts. That’s shocking, isn’t it?
Ryan Estis (27m 1s):
I mean, I’m not an extrovert, so I love Bootcamp, I love that energy, but it takes a lot to get me in that. And then when I get outta that, I have to really kind of decompress and go inwards. So last night was on the couch by myself, like I have to sort of reset myself for a couple days. I think a lot of people that do this, we have a lot of, we’re around a lot of intellectual people, people that have gone deep into a subject, they’ve explored the depths of that, their thinkers, their students. And so, you know, to write a book that’s a very personal journey. You’re spending a lot of time alone with your thoughts. You’re writing in front of the computer to write a speech.
Ryan Estis (27m 40s):
It’s the same thing to rehearse a speech. So it’s the opposite of I think what lay people, but like, oh look at this guy and he’s so gregarious and loud and he tells great jokes and he must be the wife of the party. And it’s actually quite the opposite. That’s the performance art piece. But to put that package together, it’s a very oftentimes a very solo exploration.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (28m 2s):
So, and after the schedule That you just described, you can’t show up to a keynote and say, Hey guys, I’m, I’m a little tired, I’m a little jet lagged so I’m only gonna give you half of Ryan today. Oh you can’t do that, you have to get ready for the game. Right It and that’s probably a whole process in itself.
Ryan Estis (28m 19s):
Yeah, look, I mean you know, particularly as I’ve gotten a little older, like self-care is critical. And so it’s hydration, diet, exercise, meditation, mental health, fitness, like that all plays a role. It’s, you know, I’ve got a fitness appointment at five o’clock today with my trainer. I don’t wanna go. I’m not looking forward to it. It’s the reason I have a trainer because if I didn’t already pay him and book the appointment, I probably would blow it off. But I also at the point now that’s part of this job, I have to go do that to do this job. And so it’s just the price of admission. I try to create systems where I don’t have to think about those things. But absolutely for me, having a community professional community helps mitigate some of the sort of challenges like, you know, I was speaking Saturday in Dallas, Seth was speaking Saturday in Houston, we’re texting Josh when we get off the stage.
Ryan Estis (29m 13s):
We’re not alone in this work anymore. And there’s a sense of community and comradery and support around that. And then making sure your home life is good when you get off the road. That’s been a big focus in mine too. So I’ve never actually felt better about doing this work and it’s because I’m doing it with people like you and the community. So that’s the way I see the future. We’re better together.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (29m 35s):
It’s definitely important to be not isolated, especially when you’re doing so much traveling by yourself, et cetera. So I really, really see the benefit of that community. Ryan, you mentioned the book and you just have a book that just came out recently too, right?
Ryan Estis (29m 48s):
It’s coming out. The book is called Prepare for Impact. We’re publishing it through Amplify our publishing partner at ImpactEleven. And the book is scheduled to be out in September. I’m really excited about, it’s a sales and leadership book. There’s a story aspect or element to the book too that it’ll support the work and I’m excited to get it out there. You know, it’s the funny thing about books, the book’s done like we’re done writing it. And so it’s like the publishing process and the timeline, you know how that works. So it’s a bit of a process.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (30m 16s):
I always say writing a book is like giving birth. It just takes forever ever. And then all of a sudden it just squirts out and that’s what you’re waiting for. You’re waiting for the big due date. And you mentioned it also has a story behind it. So I’m anxious to hear that. One of the things I learned from you and we, and we’re coming up on the end to the last few questions is one thing I did want to touch upon is the importance of storytelling in speeches and keynotes. And, I go to so many presentations, especially in the medical world where it’s A, put your gloves on B, you know, and half the people are sleeping on their phones in 15 minutes, so, so tell us about the importance of storytelling real quick. For those people out there who are putting together a presentation right now.
Ryan Estis (30m 55s):
People remember the story, I think 24 hours after a presentation. It’s 65% of people can recall stories, about 5% can recall statistics, stories, what connects us. It’s what opens our hearts. It’s what moves us as humans and we’re wired for story. It’s how we learn, it’s how we relate, it’s how we connect. When you say something like, yeah, I’m a crier and it was at my daughter’s wedding and I had to give this toast even a story like That, you know, I can remember, oh and I gave the best man’s speech at my best friend’s wedding from college. I was getting all choked up like, just find us. We can see ourselves in others. It, it’s a human connection.
Ryan Estis (31m 35s):
And so, you know, to be a great keynote speaker is really mastering the art of story. And so a big part of what we do at ImpactEleven is we help people cultivate and develop their storybook. You know, you’re such a wonderful gifted storyteller, but to really master that on the stage is you have to refine it, you have to workshop it, you have to tighten it up, you have to understand what part is most relevant for the audience in what part maybe, it is a little extraneous that you care about, but does it need to be part of the hour? And so there’s a skill to that and a discipline to be able to do that well.
Ryan Estis (32m 15s):
But once you’ve mastered That, you can move an audience and you know, it really is sort of the foundation to this career. And you know, you mentioned the coffee story that’s on goldcast, , that story changed my life, it changed my career, it changed my notoriety as a keynote speaker. It changed my access to opportunity. There’s not a week that goes by or that has gone by for the last seven or eight years where someone hasn’t reached out to me about that story. Whether they’re asking me to speak at their company or they’re telling me a story about their own life or they got a selfie with Lily at the airport. and it just reminds me that’s the power of story and that’s what we do.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (32m 56s):
And we’re gonna put a link to that on the show notes cause I want everybody to hear that. But yeah, storytelling goes back to the Bible. Jesus spoke in parables. He didn’t tell us what to do, he just told the stories and we extracted from there. So it goes way, way back. and I think that’s really the best advice we can give to people that are about to give a presentation right now. So Ryan, this has been great, but you’re not going to escape the, Liz. We didn’t, we didn’t prepare him for this, did we?
Liz Poret-Christ (33m 21s):
We did not cheat and give him the question. We did not do that
Dr. Anthony Orsini (33m 26s):
Sometimes we tell people ahead of time, sometimes we just forget. Unfortunately, as much as I love you my friend. So we finished every podcast with the question of what has been the most difficult conversation that you have had or type of conversation in your life? And please provide some information to and advice to people on how you navigate it through that difficult conversation.
Ryan Estis (33m 52s):
I think, and look, this is something I’ve learned a lot from you about, but I think sort of maybe the hardest group or subset of conversations to navigate around is when someone’s facing real tragedy in their life or navigating tragedy in their life, we all experienced loss, we all experienced death. and we have to grieve that process. And those conversations used to make me incredibly uncomfortable because I didn’t know what to say to someone. And the real truth is there was nothing I could say to alleviate the reality of someone’s loss or suffering. And so my tendency, because I felt uncomfortable that I couldn’t offer something to someone, was to shut down, or maybe even in some respects to avoid it and I actually think that’s a natural human response.
Ryan Estis (34m 38s):
But when my own father died and I think people that had been through that actually were proactive in reaching out and offering support and being there, I know how much that meant to me. And even if there was nothing that they could say to alleviate what I was feeling, their presence or the fact that they showed up and I knew they care how much that meant to me. And so I have a much different approach around those situations now. I over-index, you know, I over-communicate or I just make sure my presence is known and I even lead with that. I know there’s nothing I could say to alleviate what you’re feeling except that I love you, I care, I’m here for you. and I. Think during difficulty periods, and it could be loss or it could be some other difficulty that someone’s navigating, just understand I might not be able to take away your pain or your suffering, but I can show up with presence and let you know that I see you and I care about you and I love you.
Ryan Estis (35m 33s):
That learning how to do that and I think has really helped me and it’s made me feel better because I don’t have anxiety that I’m avoiding something I don’t know what to say or don’t feel weird. It’s like it doesn’t matter what I know, what I know how to do is show up. and I think that really is important for relationships and I think what you’re teaching particularly is so, so important in that domain. Those are some of the most challenging conversations of life, and a big lesson that I’ve learned a lot around it, going through some challenges myself.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (36m 4s):
Well, thank you, that’s great advice and certainly you made Liz and I smile when you were talking about that because that is the message. Just say you’re sorry and say I’m here for you and that’s all you need to say. Just the other day I had a friend of mine who said his cousin’s daughter died in weeks ago and I haven’t called him, you know, he goes, I don’t know what to say. and I said, say you’re sorry and shut up. That’s it. Just listen. And so great advice, Ryan, this has been a great episode, a great interview. It’s always fun to see your face and talk to you and I’m gonna keep staying involved in ImpactEleven. For those people out there who are interested in this field, in this business, highly recommend looking up ImpactEleven. We’ll put all the links for Ryan and the links for ImpactEleven on the show notes and it’s just gonna be great.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (36m 48s):
and I highly recommend that anybody can reach me. If you’ve enjoyed this podcast, please go ahead and hit subscribe. Download all the previous episodes. Ryan can be reached at RyanEstis.com. That’s correct, Ryan,
Ryan Estis (36m 59s):
That is correct.
Dr. Anthony Orsini (36m 60s):
Thank you again, Ryan, I really appreciate this. Thanks again, Liz for joining in. Of course, and I’ll see you soon, Ryan.
Ryan Estis (37m 6s):
All right, guys, take care was a gift. Thank you.
Announcer (37m 10s):
If you enjoyed this podcast, please hit the subscribe button and leave a comment and review. To contact Dr. Orsini and his team or to suggest guests for future podcast, visit us at the Orsini Way.com. The comments and opinions of the interviewer and guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and beliefs of their present and past employers or institutions.
Show Notes
Hosts:
Anthony Orsini
Liz Poret-Christ
Guest:
Ryan Estis
For More Information:
Difficult Conversations Podcast
Resources
Ryan Estis & Associates YouTube
A Cup of Coffee Changed My Life-Ryan Estis-Goalcast (YouTube)
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